I See You

I follow someone on Instagram, and she posted in her stories about this hateful comment she got on her Youtube channel. She had posted a day in her life video and some troll slammed her saying ” Omg this is so depessing..It is daycare! Not school. I’m sure she will have sweet memories of a frantic mother running around and not being present. “

I know the comment wasn’t about me, obviously. But it sure stung.

Words cannot describe how irate comments like that make me. First of all, when we refer to daycare/preschool in our house, we say school. Because Zoe is learning there. She is learning social skills, potty training, the alphabet, numbers, songs, motor skills, sharing, art….everything. I don’t care if it is “daycare” or “preschool” or whatever you want to refer to it as.

The fact of the matter is, we are a dual income household, and therefore, our daughter attends preschool full time. That doesn’t mean I love her any less than a stay at home mom. She loves her school and gets excited about going. She has amazing teachers who love her and teach her things in different ways than I do. I feel like it only helps her more, as she is learning many different styles of learning and teaching. She has so many friends there, and watching their relationships grow is the sweetest thing.

Also, I instantly felt shamed. Am I a terrible mother??? Because here is a bit of raw, honest truth. Pretty much every morning I am running around like a frantic lunatic trying to get out the door and to work on time. Have you ever tried waking a toddler??? They are like teenagers. Zoe tells me to go away, pulls her blanket over her head and ignores me. Stiffens her body so I cant even pick her up. And have you ever tried to get an opinionated toddler dressed? I swear she takes longer than me to pick out an outfit! And don’t get me started on the shoes. Dear Lord, send help! It takes about 25 minutes just to get Zoe pottied, dressed, and sort of ready to head out the door. And she has to walk down the stairs one step at a time, while asking me important life questions and getting philosophical on me. All the while, I am saying things like, come on…lets keep walking on down.

Inevitably, I lose my temper some mornings and raise my voice. And Zoe raises hers right back with “Don’t yell at me, mommy!!! You’re not my best friend anymore!” And I can tell instantly that I have hurt her feelings. And I feel like shit.

I am sharing all of this to say, I see you working mom. Hell, even if you aren’t a mom, but maybe you get frustrated with your spouse in the morning when you are heading out the door and you aren’t as nice to them as you should have been. Or you fuss at your dog because they don’t do their business fast enough out in the back yard. I see you. I am you. We are all human, and life will wear on you.

The thing is, work is still going to be there when you get there. It isn’t going anywhere. Regardless if you screamed at your toddler or you laughed with her and sang a silly song while fixing her hair, you are still going to get there at the same time. Probably faster, because epic meltdowns take way longer than if you would have just let them go at their own pace to get that last shoe on, am I right?!?!

So next time you feel your patience running thin in the morning, instead of completely losing your cool, take a breath. Remember that mornings are hard, and your little one is just doing the best they can to get ready for the day. It is their day too. It is their day too. Let the phrase sink in for a moment. I know I will from now on.