It looks like it is time for another edition of:
You can check out what he has said in the past here, here and here.
–Chris bought this new iphone case that is a bottle opener. He is like really REALLY proud of this shit because he pulls it out everywhere and has to show everyone. I mean…it is pretty cool. Well, one afternoon we were at On Tap and his phone face planted into the concrete. Amazingly the phone didn’t break or shatter!
The general consensus he and his friend came up with? “The spirit of the hops saved it.”
–A Nationwide commercial came on.
Chris: ” You recognize this song?”
Me: “I think I have heard it before, yeah….”
Chris: “It is from PLL, I have it on my phone.”
**PLL is Pretty Little Liars for those of you who are not cool enough to be watching the greatest high school girly drama show on ABC family.
–We are watching Law and Order SVU.
Me: “Oh Wong is angry! I love it when he gets angry!”
Chris: “Does he give you a hard wong.”
Me: “Maybe”
–Our little Mac somehow managed to swallow an entire chicken wing whole. We were really worried about him for a few days. I mean…..he is 7 lbs, how in the hell did he even manage to get a wing in his little mouth, yet alone swallow it whole?!?!?!?!? Mac jumps up on the couch the night after it happens.
Chris: “Hey bone crusher.”
–We are sitting out on our deck one evening and Chris says that he really likes the smells of certain sexy perfumes and wishes I would wear one.
Me” Do you not like my Coach perfumes?”
Chris “Maybe they are just too classy for me.”
Me” What does that even mean?!?!”
That weekend we are getting dressed and I spray some cheap ass Britney Spears “Midnight Fantasy” perfume I bought several years ago…probably when I was in college.
Chris “Oh yeah….that’s the stuff!!!!!”
Me” Ummm I smell cheap.”
Chris ” I love it when you smell like a stripper.”
Me “Awesome.”
I mean…..the freaking bottle has rhinestones on it for goodness sakes….to each their own…
23 Comments
These are great!! I have to say my fave, since I am in love with SVU is, “Does he give you a hard wong?” HAHAHA!!
I love it when you smell like a stripper! Ha! That is probably so true. Also that phone case is awesome… I have a bottle opener in my car but on the phone case is even better. And poor Mac but I do love the new nickname!
I love it when you smell like a stripper, bahahahahaha!
Mac is the dog!! A whole chicken wing is amazing!
Bone Crusher!
hahahah re: B.D. Wong
STOP I am laughing SO hard reading these! Bone crusher!
Sidenote- I also LIVE for the episodes where Wong gets heated. I will forever think of “does it make your wong hard”
I was rolling with all the stuff y’all talked about. Whitney and I are the same way. Maybe one day, I will do something like this for me and her. MAYBE!!!
I think I block the stupid stuff my fiance says.. I mean, I know he says it.. A LOT.. but, I can’t bring any of it to mind.. Maybe I should.. because it literally makes me twitch.
But I LOVE HIM! hahahahaha.
That definitely is an amazing iphone case! LOL your normal perfume is “too classy” haha.
““The spirit of the hops saved it.”” Bahahhahaa! “I love it when you smell like a stripper!” BAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Oh, Chris! 😀
that bottle opener case is awesome! chris says the funniest thing; esp the hard wong part LOL
hahahahaha i love when you smell like a stripper! hilarious! that phone case is pretty epic. bone crusher? oh my goodness how DID that little dog get that in his belly? haha. love these, totally want to do it next month.
Laughing so hard at the stripper comment. You should get some glitter lotion too!
does he give you a hard wong. i die.
OMG I love these all. The spirit of the hops and hard wong, too funny! The fact that he admitted the song from PLL is on his phone, man card taken away! 😉
HAHAH these are my favorite posts. Love the perfume and bone crusher!
Chris is hilarious! I’ve got to give it to him on the hard wong one.
Does he give you a hard wong? HAHAHA omg too funny!
Oh my goodness… where can I get that phone case??!
Also, I have “nicer” perfumes, yet I always get the most compliments on the Britney Spears and JLO Glow….no joke. Guess he’s not the only one who likes stripper scent!
If you really want to impress Chris, look into the iphone case that’s also a stun gun. It drove my guy friends nuts.
-Jackie
I am in both shock and awe that you can remember all of the stuff that comes out of his mouth!! Or just pick the favorites??! 🙂 This is too funny!
I’m pretty proud of the fact that I already knew all of these via our daily badass emails. The things men says…
I love it when you smell like a stripper. That shit is classic.
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